Ethan Tu

year: Freshman

Hometown: Warren, NJ

Past teams: NJ Devyl, Watchung Hills Warriors

Built from the ground up in the thriving metropolis of Warren, New Jersey, this small medium at large has been known to sprint so fast his opponents go “whoa”. Known for his frequent bids and huge vertical, Ethan spends so much time with his feet off the ground that he has well and truly lost contact with reality. Due to his tendency to spout such delusions as “I don’t need to weightlift” and “I only need two minutes to get ready for practice”, some members of the team have wondered about his mental state.

Others have been convinced that, rather, Ethan has ascended to a higher plane of consciousness: one where beds aren't necessary, the code of all the universe is revealed to him, and the phrase “practice starts at” has no meaning. Still others think he just spends too much time away from the TEAM, resulting in a slow creeping loss of touch with reality. The jury’s still out on this issue.

When not skying people twice his height, Ethan Tu has also been known to make so much money the high-ups at his bank gets suspicious. It’s rumored that he’s already a billionaire, and only puts on the airs of needing money to fit in at college, which he’s only doing for fun. Overall, Ethan is more than just a skier of fools and bid connoisseur – he’s an enigma.

Only time will reveal his true nature.