Tony Goss

Nickname: Smol Tony, chaos god

year: junior

Hometown: Seattle, WA

Past teams: somerville bag, slow white?, Garfield Purple Haze, DiscNW Yccs

Tony “Fat Tony” Goss, hailing from the rainy city of Seattle, is one of the newest additions to the Emen. Growing up an avid Seahawks fan, he learned from a young age that it’s always better to pass the ball than run it, even when, say, you’re on the one yard line in the Super Bowl and have the best RB in the league. It was this mentality that attracted him to the sport where the biscuits fly far and no one ever runs with the disc.

Coming from, in his words, “The most elite ultimate scene in the world,” Tony had low expectations for ultimate on the east coast. This all changed when he stumbled upon a practice of the legendary Elephant Men. Blown away by their stack DISCipline (lol), the sheer size of their neccs, and an O-line handler with no knees wearing kitchen gloves and tossing 60-yard hammers, Tony immediately signed up and doubled down on his ab exercise routine in hopes of making the TEAM. After a long and tedious tryout process, which included practice in the snow and a trip to God’s country—are we in Canada?—Maine, Tony was accepted into the newest ranks of A-TEAM scum on Tufts campus.

Having successfully made the TEAM, Tony is looking to add some of that small ball west coast offense to the Emen as a speedy lefty handler. Questions for his career on the Emen include:

Can he take the crown as top tweaker on the TEAM?
How many times will he mention that he’s from Seattle?
Do all Seattle players get an automatic +5 overall when playing in the rain?
Will he ever get the 12-pack abs he’s worked so hard for?

All this and more will be answered in the coming seasons. Stay tuned.